Be with the Pain: You are hurting. Admit it. To feel pain after loss is normal - proof that you are alive; proof that you are able to respond.

You are not Alone: Loss is part of life. Everyone experiences it.

YOU WILL SURVIVE: Believe that you WILL HEAL.

Give Yourself Time to Heal: The greater the loss - the more time it will take.

Healing has Progressions and Regressions: Healing and growth is not a smooth upward progression, but full of ups and downs - dramatic leaps and depressing backslides.

Tomorrow Will Come: Your life has been full of positive experiences - THEY WILL RETURN.

Take Good Care of You: Get plenty of rest. Stick to a schedule. Plan your days. Activity will give you a sense of order.

Keep Decision-making to a Minimum: Expect your judgment to be clouded for a while. You are going through change; don’t add additional ones.

Seek Comforting: Accept support from others - SEEK IT. It is human and courageous.

Suicide Thoughts: These may arise - they are a symptom of pain. If you feel they are getting out of control, SEEK HELP AT ONCE.

Do Your Mourning Now: Allow yourself to be with your pain - it will pass sooner. Postponed grief can return later to haunt you. Grief feelings WILL be expressed (one way or another).

Be Gentle With Yourself: You have suffered a disabling emotional wound - treat yourself with care.

Let Yourself Heal Completely: Give yourself time. You are a convalescent right now. Don’t jump into new things too quickly.

It is OK to Feel Depressed: Crying is cleansing - a wonderful release. Be with these feelings for awhile.

It is OK to Feel Anger: Everyone acts angry at the loss of love. Channel it wisely, and it will go away as you heal. Hit a pillow. Kick on a bed. Yell and scream when you are alone. Run - Play hard games. Hit a punching bag.